on being famous

It is tough being famous. Yes, I am referring to my recent interview/stardom on the local SA news. All the paparazzi, the autograph seekers, and the groupies who just want to use me to get backstage at all the best concerts. Stores send me exclusive offers – I get up to 10% off just for making a personal appearance at their location! (They mail those right to my house.) At all my favorite restaurants, absolutely no waiting. I just drive right up to a window and they hand me my food. It is really too much. Seriously folks, I am just a regular guy like everyone else.